A twelve-inch tennant and a semi-prisoner

Wow, a lot of changes since my last post. There are SOOOO many things about pregnancy that people did not tell me and I know exactly why. There are just some things you don't say out loud. I respect that, but man, oh man do I wish I had been prepared! If you've been prego you know what I'm talking about and if you haven't, sorry, there's just no way I can fill you in without ruining tonight's dinner. In the end, I know it will all be worth it though- only 3 more months 'til I get to see my little Ziggy!

I will say that I feel like I can relate to someone who has spent time in prison. I'm sure you're wondering why and it's easy. Between myself and a prisoner, I'm not sure who is more terrified of dropping their soap. Seriously. At night in the shower, when I drop my soap I literally want to cry. There is just no easy way to retrieve that little white mass and trust me, I've tried EVERYTHING. Bending forward is no longer an option, because my kangaroo pouch is simply too big. Squatting is hard, because my back is starting to hurt. I have recently discovered the sumo squat and that seems to be the best solution for right now. If I get any bigger, which I'm bound to, I'm not sure what I will do. Perhaps I will dig my nails into my bar of soap at the beginning of my shower and use that as a soap preserve in the event that I lose the entire bar. I imagine that I've got about 2 weeks left before the bar will be lost forever. Ugh. As I said, I now have something to talk about with an ex-con.

Also, things have disappeared, due to my belly. No one told me this would happen!!! OMG, in just a week's time I can no longer see...myself...in...certain...places. Let's just say that I'm glad swim season is over because it may be too late for any 'alterations' I may wish to make regarding swim attire. Yeah, that's right ladies, things disappear!!! All of a sudden, I have invisible body parts that I thought I would never lose sight of! Maybe I was naive or absent-minded not to expect this but I must admit that I was taken aback when I made the discovery. That is one of the things no one told me would happen and dang it I think that's important! I have a bone to pick with my mom and sister; I needed to know!!! I'm over it now and making do. I mean, as best I can. So far, it hasn't turned into a dangerous situation, but again, I foresee another 2-3 weeks before I have to start flying blind. I'm not sure what I'm going to do. Hmmm....I will cross that bridge when I get there.

Enough about me, on to Ziggy!!! My little boopie is a busy body! When I tell you there is marathon training happening in my belly that is an understatement. Ziggy is now visible to the outside world in the form of lumps that poke up and down in my belly. I've been seeing them for a while but now that Ziggy is bigger other people can see and it's pretty neat. It has started to tickle in the last week, which is neat. I'm starting to bond with my baby as a person. When I feel little kicks I feel like I have a little friend all to myself that hangs out with me all day. It's pretty neat. I can see myself missing Ziggy when he/she is gone; thank goodness they will still be in my life though.

The other day I was confused because I felt kicks in two different places across my belly. I figured one kick was a real kick and the other was residual movement from the placenta. THEN I read my 24 week update and it said that Ziggy is one foot long! My gosh, both kicks were my baby!!! I can't believe I didn't realize how big my boopie has gotten. I remember when there was just a little apple in my belly and now I've got a foot-long, pounder in there. Nice!

On that note, I'm going to grab some dinner. By the way, Ziggy says hi. He/she started kicking as soon as I started typing this blog. Tootles!

The Pounder

Sooo...Ziggy weighs one pound now and just when my little munchkin gets into the 'pound' club mommy gets sick. I have had a drug free pregnancy so far- not even a tylenol, and I was hoping to go the whole way without any meds. However, on Sunday night Death came knocking on my door. It was horrible! I coughed so hard I hurt my back and had to sleep upright all night. Weldon said I better call the doctor before it gets worse so I did and he put me on some meds. Last night was the first night and boy did Ziggy tweak out! I saw and felt little lumps across my belly the whole night. Of course I'm scared that Ziggy was having Woodstock in my belly. Hopefully it is pure coincidence and I won't give birth to a mucinex crack baby.

Anyhoo, I'm still very comfortable. Although I'm not supposed to, I sleep on my back. It's the only way I can really get good sleep. Sometimes I start out with my right leg propped up like the doctor says I should do, but I always wake up on my back. I haven't had any more nerve attacks so I feel very fortunate. My only complaint is that my belly and lady lumps are itchy. I mean REALLY itchy. I got some palmer's lotion and it helped a little bit, perhaps I'll try using a little more. I'm still able to run, I mean jog, which still feels nice. I feel like a spaz when I don't get in my exercise (I'm totally into fitness for the endorphins). If I have to stop running I'll try walking uphill. Yoga is still okay, although I do it sporadically...I should probably do better.

I was worried about my appetite because it hasn't changed at all. I don't have any cravings so it makes it harder for me to eat a lot to support Ziggy. The doctor says that is okay and I have still gained 15 pounds, which is good. I must say that my hunger is getting more pronounced as of late so there could be a change on the prowl.

All in all, I probably have the world's most uneventful pregnancy. My mom told me this would happen. She said she should have had 10 children because her pregnancies were a breeze- I guess I inherited her way. I'm not complainining one bit though- thank the lawd!!!

Here are a couple of pics of my little Ziggy-pooh. Place your bets on gender...

Tootles!

P or No?

Um...sooooo...since I've been pregnant I've noticed a strange behavior in myself: perversion. It's so out of character. Normally I am the girl who makes subliminal comments for a good laugh but I'm not too outward about 'extracurricular activities'. That is, until Ziggy. I noticed this new found perversion recently when I was reading a celebrity gossip blog. To the left of the news story there was a link to click on 'celebrities caught on tape'. In the past, I wouldn't have clicked. It's just not my thing. But-uh, on this particular day I clicked....and peeked...and giggled...and clicked more...and scrolled down...and gasped...and clicked more. Twenty minutes later I realized that I was officially being a cyber 'dirty old man' so I stopped myself. I couldn't believe I had done that!!! Weldon was in the other room...how icky is that?!!!

I later told a friend of my findings on the gossip site. At first I saw nothing wrong with what I was sharing, then I noticed she looked at me weird. Uh oh...'celebrities caught on tape' was really just good old fashion porn pics. Gross!!! Who does that?? I've NEVER done that. I started thinking that something must've switched. It didn't take me long to realize that I have been looking at pictures of girlie parts for 5 months now on pregnancy blogs. My femininity has now switched roles and so things are not as taboo for me anymore. My body is now a vehicle with which I will nurture my baby. 'Lady lumps' are now baby bottles, for Pete's sake! I've got to get a hold of this dirty old man thing fast. I'm hoping I will switch back to my old self sooner than later.

On another note, Ziggy is now the length of a banana (that's kind of ironic, heh heh). My little banana actually kicks me all the time now. It's my favorite thing, too. Tonight was the first time I saw a kick from the outside. It is the most fascinating thing ever!!! I stared at my belly for the longest time watching Ziggy...what exactly was Ziggy doing??? Dancing? Stretching? I wonder what they're doing in there. At any rate, I'm still feeling great and hoping to continue on this blessed streak until the end of January.

Until next time...

Five Alive

Wow, it's been a while. I bet you can guess what the hold up has been: school started. I'm back in the working world. After two weeks, my body finally readjusted to getting up in the morning, projecting my voice, and standing on my feet for extended periods of time. At first, it was culture shock. When the alarm went off on the first day, I was scared there was a fire. In the car on the way to work, I kept wondering why there were so many other people on the road. It's funny what one can forget over the summer. At any rate, I'm happy to be back working. The summer was quite rejuvenating. Also, the anticipation of Ziggy made it a summer I will never forget: the last summer I'll spend as a non-mommy. GASP!!!

I get butterflies thinking about it. The other day I imagined how I will react when my water breaks. What will happen in the delivery room? Then it hit me: I will have a baby. One that I will keep forever...and ever. It will be my very own. What will become of life? Who will I be as a mother? Wellie and me??? Will there still be such a thing? The day before school started I wept in my husband's arms. I wasn't sad about the start of school, rather, sentimental at the truth of this past summer. I realized that it was the last summer that Weldon and I spent together, just the two of us. As I cried I told him that I am looking forward to being a parent and I'd see him in about 20 years. We will be old and gray the next time it is just us. Boy oh boy, how bittersweet is that?!

As a person who is totally into my marriage, I was always leary of having children. Weldon and I are so happy and we truly enjoy each other. Children were never a must-have for us; they were only ever a bonus. We always said that if God wants us to be parents, he will plant the seed in our heads, we never laid out a life plan for when we would start a family. We've been a family since the day we got married. Now, we are finally growing and it is so alarming at times. What a change!! I'm excited to team up with him to raise these kiddos. BUT (the infamous but), I am protective of my marriage. I don't want to lose what we have. Only a mother can explain the balance to me, maybe not even then. Perhaps when Ziggy comes it will all lay into place and make perfect sense. Until then, the anticipation is quite the emotional roller coaster.

Speaking of Ziggy. We are now 20 weeks along...aka...5 months! This is the first time in my life I can say that time is both flying by and standing still. I can't believe I am sitting here as my baby dances in my belly. It seemed like only yesterday I was sitting at the doctor's office praying that there would be a heartbeat in the UltraSound. Now here I am, with living proof every day that Ziggy is alive and well...and quite the character.

We have already had a standoff in the bed. My little eggplant didn't want me to lay on a certain side. Both of us stubbornly awaited the other to move. After 20 minutes I realized something: this baby is most likely an attitudinal little girl. That's right, I lost the battle. There was a part of me, however, that loooovvveeed the self-advocacy coming from my womb. I winked at my unborn child as I shifted in humble submission. Like I said before: I don't care about 'Alissa' anymore.

Since we last touched base I have also become a yogi. I'm truly enjoying it and I must say the breathing techniques are helpful, especially with school being in session. So far I get good sleep at night, about 7 hours' worth. I'm hoping I can somehow create a bank of energy that will carry over to January when Ziggy comes to tire me out. We'll see how that goes.

Other than the usual wonders of pregnancy not much else has been going on. I have been spending time with friends and family. Ziggy has been to a birthday party, a going away party, in which she was walked on by her cousin, seen various movies, and even been to a Dallas Cowboys football game at the new souped up psychadelic stadium. What a social life this little eggplant has! I can't wait to experience more Adventures of Ziggy as time goes by. Of course, I will keep you posted every step of the way.

Until next time...

Shalom

Some nerve...

OMG...this morning I was awoken out of my sleep by an excruciating pain in my lower back and all the way down my leg. I woke Weldon up and the two of us concluded it was probably my kidney. Yesterday I didn't drink a lot of water, perhaps a prego can't get away with that. Weldon suggeseted I drink some water. I went to the kitchen and chugged down a glass of H20. Moments later, the water didn't help- the pain persisted. Ouch! I decided I needed to be more aggressive in figuring this thing out, for Ziggy at the very least. I knew the hospital was where I needed to go but decided to try one more resource: nurse mommy. First, I shed a few tears. Dadbobbit, I'm a scaredy cat. I started worrying about what on earth was causing pain that was bad enough to wake me up. Of course I started fighting against thoughts of the worst while keeping in mind the pain was nowhere in the vicinity of my baby. I gathered my composure and called my mom. I asked her what she thought was going on and she immediately ruled out a kidney problem. Apparently, those don't come out of nowhere, especially for a person with no history. I am famous for self-diagnosis and was once again, incorrect.

"It's sciatica", she said sleepily (the call took place at 7am this morning). I googled this strange word with her on the phone and knew she hit the jackpot. Apparently some nerve called the sciatic nerve gets irritated easier during pregnancy. The pain shoots in the exact locale of my pain this morning and is relieved by bedrest and yoga. I stayed in bed for quite a while this morning and am in much better shape...thank goodness!!! It was pretty scary though. I have been spoiled with a painless, easy-breezy pregnancy and that truly threw me for a loop.

Speaking of yoga, I tried it on Wednesday. It was awesome!!! I felt so empowered doing strength training again. There is a lot more resistance involved in yoga than I remembered from classes I took years ago. I found myself struggling through certain poses, which I know is good for me and Ziggy. There was only one pose I couldn't do because my grapefruit was in the way. Yeah, that's right, Ziggy is now the size of a grapefruit...so big!!! I left the yoga class and got a video so I can do it out of my house whenever I want. I'm so happy that I will be a yogi!!!

So, yeah, Ziggy the Grapefruit is coming along. Other than the crazy nerve sitch everything has been great. In fact...

ZIGGY KICKED ME!!!

This time it wasn't a muscle spasm...I triple checked to make sure. It was my baby! It was the neatest thing ever. Of course I got greedy and wanted more kicks. I set my phone on vibrate and started buzzing all over my belly in hopes of stimulating Ziggy. It didn't work :( I was hoping we could play a little peek-a-boo game where I buzz and Ziggy kicks. No such luck. Oh well, at least my baby moved! Yippee!!!

PS I'm still 17 weeks along, which means my baby is advanced! Yayuh!

Enough said! Tootles!

Sooooo...I felt little flutters in my side last night. I felt elated that Ziggy finally kicked me! How crazy is it that pregnancy makes me want to get my butt totally kicked?! I really do though, Ziggy can sucker punch me or dropkick me anytime. I was just about to get up and catalog this milestone in my baby's prelife when suddenly I felt the same sweet little flutters in my lower back...then my upper leg. Oh no....

...a friggin' muscle spasm.

All this laying on my side has my muscles spazzing out at night. What a tease! Technically, kicks aren't due until week 18 or 19 and I'm only 17 weeks. Ziggy has already proven to be advanced so an early kick wouldn't surprise me. What? Oh, you didn't know that my baby is advanced? Yep. On our 8-week sono the doctor saw the spine and gasped involuntarily at how amazing it is. He said, "That's a really good spine" in the same tone you would say that a steak was good. He then printed an extra picture of my baby and said that he wanted to keep it for himself. My baby's spine is so magnificent that even an MD wanted a picture of it. I'm not bragging, just telling the facts.

Anyhoo, since Ziggy didn't kick me it would appear that I have another issue: my muscles are tense. I'm gonna go ahead and start yoga tomorrow. I figure if I get flexible enough I won't have to differentiate between baby kicks and muscle spasms. Maybe I will even be able to do the splits on the delivery table. Hmmm, would that be helpful or harmful? Better yet, what would that look like? Ew! Nevermind, I will just utilize any breathing techniques I learn while in yoga. Learning how to breathe properly would most likely calm me down since I'm a little nervous about delivery. My biggest fear is totally freaking out and trying to push my baby out as soon as my water breaks. I can be a little impulsive at times so I better go get on this yoga hustle to learn to manage my bad nerves.

Until next time...

I am not negative, I am a dancer.

I was reading someone's blog recently and she made an interesting comment. She said that the only rights she has with people are to accept them for who they are or stay away from them. Wow. That resonated with me. I have a problem with the shady little gray area I have created within this ideal. You see, I accept people for who they are (unless they piss me off or do something I think is stupid, then I 'vent' with someone else about how much they suck at life). I also stay away from people (unless I don't, which is the case with certain people in my life I have absolutely not accepted yet still associate with). Ugh! I'm wasting my time and others'. What a loser! So my plan is to now negate the gray area I have created and do the following: 1) stop 'venting' about people, because it is glorifed gossip and a reason to be bratty. 2) stop hanging around people I simply cannot deal with 3) truly accept people I simply cannot avoid 4) get cooler and more humble, heck, people accept my imperfections!



Someone who is really good at this is my sister (shout out!!). She has never been rude or nasty about people behind their backs. People have disappeared from her circle of friends over the years, but she never blasphemes people. She's pretty smart. I guess I feel guilty ex-ing people out of my life but now I realize I'm making myself miserable by keeping them around. I'm not a deity, I am not strong enough to be around people I can't accept. My pride has gotten in the way of my happiness!!! I'm the only idiot wasting my time with people I can't accept. Man...where was I when the memo was sent? Now I'm just plain embarassed.



I can't wait to see what I will do with all of my free time now that I will start to live by a new ideal. My conversations with my bff/hubby will be a lot different, because he's the one to whom I do most of my venting. I'm sure he will be relieved to hear me talk about something else besides how annoyed I am by people all the time. Perhaps I will take up reality TV watching. Better yet, I may even film my own life and post it on YouTube. There could be some things folks would find entertaining.

I will start off with my job. I teach middle school Spanish. It could be considered entertainment to watch me try to teach native Texans how to speak Spanish. PS: Texas is a red state. Funny!!!! I will also zoom in on the kids who eat boogers while reading library books. It's gross, because I see the books change hands from kid to kid and all I can picture is Kid A wiping his boogie on page 35. Yuck! If kids knew they were touching each other's boogies they probably wouldn't be so snotty towards each other (no pun intended).



Another point of interest would definitely have to be my cat. He sleeps just about all the time, but manages to find a new position EVERY time he naps. I don't get it. I've had him for six years and he still finds new positions. Take a look at this one:



Is he really comfortable? The other thing I find really odd about my cat is that he always opens his eyes for pictures. He's ALWAYS looking at the camera. I can never catch him off guard. How does he know?! He was totally knocked out until he heard my camera beep and then those little marble eyes opened up. Scary.

I would also focus on my husband, who does basketball poses when a ballad comes on the radio. I'm not kidding. He actually does an 'air' layup or fade-away when he hears Whitney Houston. It's hilarious. He also does a security check of our house every...single...time we come home. I'm not allowed to speak, in case the thief is being quiet and sneaky. I have to stay near the garage door, in case we have to run back out of the house. Then he goes from room to room, checking closets and underneath the beds. There is a weapon involved. A metal stick that was once a curtain rod. In case the thief is there, Weldon will be ready! Believe it or not, I have actually bought in to this ritual. I sneezed once and was terrified that I had given the thief opportunity to make a move. What's going on at the Barber house?!

Finally, I would turn the camera on myself. I actually sit for extended periods of time in my house with no television or music. What am I doing? Not reading, just thinking. It shows all over my face, too. Weldon says I look like a victim of shock. What am I thinking about? My 'to-do' list or designing a new outfit in my head or decorating my dream house. My favorite daydream is adopting a 2-year old. I know it's weird because I'm pregnant but I literally fantasize about bringing home a little 2-year old and putting her in a bubble bath and then feeding her the best meal she's ever had. Yes, it's always a girl. I actually get annoyed when Weldon interrupts me! If you don't daydream, then you should. It's pretty relaxing. I also have dance routines that I am dedicated to, they usually occur before I cook. In my head I am doing lyrical interpretations of Alicia Keys' songs, but in person I probably look like I'm having a seizure. Sometimes, Weldon walks into the kitchen while I'm dancing and I pretend I'm swatting a fly or stretching...it's too embarassing to own up to my dreams of being a dancer. I also do gymnastic beam routines on my tile lines. I'm really good at turns and jumps, I always stick my landing, too.

Already I am excited to have more free time. What a relief that I don't have to be weighed down by negativity. I feel dumb for figuring it out late but thanks to the blogger and my sister, I have good role models to keep me on track.

Shalom.